Casey had the bus loaded for Joshua Tree the night before he left. His parents didn’t really have any questions for him, he told them about the pay and they seemed happy about that, so he said his goodbyes at bedtime and crept out at dawn. But before leaving San Diego he drove to Torrey Pines State Beach just south of Del Mar to look out at the ocean. Even though he had never been to Joshua Tree he knew that it was a special, so he wanted the last place he spent time in San Diego to be special too. He left the bus parked in a red zone and sat on the cliffs watching the waves crashing and the sky changing color.
He thought he saw a whale spout, it was too far off to confirm, but they were common this time of year, migrating past Southern California. After taking a few deep breaths, he rested his palms on the soft earth of the sandstone cliffs, and then gently rubbed them together. He said goodbye to the ocean and got back in the bus to drive north.
If he had wanted, Casey could have been in Joshua Tree in three hours but he preferred to take his time, plus he wasn’t expected until the afternoon. He made stops at vistas, and washes, and at the iconic Cabazon dinosaurs where he took lots of photos. He climbed the stairs inside the big T-Rex that went all the way up into it’s mouth where he sat for a long time, looking out through it’s jaggedy teeth, and smoking. He took a few puffs of an old joint too and then laid down. The drone of the freeway nearly lulled him to sleep, that is until he heard the echoes of a family with small kids clambering up the narrow stairs. He quickly collected himself and departed so he could pass them on the way down instead of surprising them by at the top.
Back on the I10 freeway, heading east, he would soon take a left turn and north towards Morongo Valley, then further east to Yucca Valley and Joshua Tree. Palm Springs was was only another 30 minutes past his turnoff, Casey had been there before, once with his family as a kid, that’s how he knew about Cabazon. But the road heading north that he had just turned onto, the route to Joshua Tree, was new to him. Casey loved new and started taking in everything, he came alive.
The bus slowed to meet the long incline, gaining the elevation required to reach the high desert and granting ample opportunity to look around while still driving. He stopped for lunch in Yucca Valley, eating at a taqueria that he found good even by San Diego standards. Then, not wanting to go without essentials, he stopped into a store to buy a few things, mostly cigarettes, and Cokes, and a handful of Tigers Milk bars. He didn’t know how long it would be before he would get to a store again. It turned out that it would actually be the next day as one of the things he was in charge of at the new job was restocking the kitchen.
Following the directions Vhu had written out for him he took a left at the main light in the town of Joshua Tree and drove for about 10 minutes before taking a right turn onto a dirt road. After driving slowly for another 10 minutes he reached a large entrance to a property with a ranch style gate with an overhead sign that read “Alturas Tranquilos.” This was the place. Vhu had written “Tranquil Heights” in English but Casey understood. The property stretched east, with a low grade giving way to a steeper hill and a low peak. The area he was directly driving into was mostly flat though, and spread out with multiple building sites still under some stage of construction The work seemed to be wrapping up for the day, a concrete truck was being hosed out, and a bobcat type vehicle was putting construction materials back into large shipping containers. Further up the hill, he could see another site that looked nearly finished. It was connected by a meandering switchback road where a little desert type jeep car with an open roof and no doors was now driving down.
He pulled the bus in right next to half dozen other parked cars and trucks, including another Volkswagen bus, a dune buggy, and an official looking work truck with an “Alturas Tranquilos” logo in front of a Joshua Tree drawing. Just as he hopped out of the bus the desert jeep car he had seen coming down the hill pulled up right behind him. It was Michael, with another guy, only a few years older than Casey, in the passenger seat.
“Casey! So good to see you! Nice bus by the way! How was the drive up?” Michael shouted over the construction trucks, then leaving no time for Casey to answer added, “This is Mason. He’s sort of like the site foreman. Jump in.”
Casey climbed into the back seat as Mason laughed and extended his hand over the seat to shake Casey’s “More like the camp mom.”
Michael laughed, looking back and forth between them, “That is true! Well, you’ll mostly be helping Mason the next three months. There will be some other stuff too but he’ll keep you up to speed, plus he gets to do all the fun stuff.”
Mason laughed loudly this time and Michael responded genuinely, holding his hands up, “What?”
Mason patted Michael on the shoulder “True, I get to do some pretty cool stuff! but…” he smiled now, looking between Michael and Casey “also sometimes just plain old physical labor. Plus there’s the ongoing handling of Michael and his growing list of “Let’s just see if we can do it” fantastical ideas”. Mason put the last bit in air quotes and Michael laughed loudly this time.
“That is 100% true, I will give you that. And, incredibly, you seemed to nearly always be able to make the wildest ideas come to life, I mean look at this place” Michael held his hands up and looked around then pointed at Mason “You are amazing!” Casey loved their back and forth, it seemed a lot like how Daniel and Vhu worked together.
“Okay Casey, put your seat belt on, we’ll give you the full tour around the property” Michael said, gesturing a circle with his hand in the air. Casey looked down for a seat belt, there was none in sight, or in the entire jeep, he reflexively reached his hand out to stabilize himself on the roll bar.
It was a large property, 72 Acres in total, but the main buildings and usable spaces only spread out over several acres and three primary areas. “Most of the construction is done, the big stuff anyway, you see the last of it down here. We’re finishing pouring patios and walkways this week. We call this level Tierra, it’s for reception, and check-ins. Oh, also that big hall over there will double as a gathering space for the Joshua Tree community to meet, host art shows, or talks, or voting, stuff like that, we’ll also use it during our big retreats, and dancing, or Resident trainings. Oh, there’s also residences down here for the onsite members. We call them Residents, you’ll be a Resident while you’re here, it’s basically all the insiders. Lots of facilities down here too, trash, compost, landscaping, and receiving. There’s also gonna be a café, modeled after the Quonset Hut.” Just as Michael was saying it, they rounded a corner, and an actual Quonset hut appeared, although it was empty and you could see all the way through. There was a second Quonset Hut just beyond the first one with doors on it and a long loading dock. “That’s for deliveries and storage” Michael pointed “Now let’s head up to the Vista level, that’s where it starts to get really exciting. The Vista level consisted of several different buildings, and a lot of indoor/outdoor spaces centered around a large western facing compound courtyard with a spectacular pool, an outdoor bar/kitchen, little cabanas, and shade structures still going up. The whole level was perched long and wide on a fairly big flat area considering it was on a hillside.
The western side of the Vista level was completely unobstructed with the buildings strategically placed so they all had views, and backing to the east, where a low mountain and higher peak with a much steeper hillside shot up. Past the main retreat site were ten or so smaller outbuildings and RV type vehicles, each being designed as retreat housing. This included an Airstream trailer with its own concrete patio and shade pergola of worn corrugated metal. “That’s where you’re staying, I’m just past you in the Mandala Hut” Mason pointed, smiling, towards the iconic aluminum trailer, and just beyond it a simple and beautiful octagonal cinder block building with a high pitched roof made of what looked like tightly bundled branches, with windows and a glass door on the west facing sides. There was a stunning patio with an outdoor shower behind a low wall, barely tall enough to cover someone up to the waist.
“That’s the shower everyone on Vista uses for now, that is until the main ones are done in a few weeks.” Mason added. It would end up taking twice as long for the new showers to be finished but once Casey realized that the Airstream had a natural sightline of the entire shower he didn’t care if they ever finished the new ones. Fortunately, he, Mason, and a few other guys continued using the outdoor shower long after the other showers were finished. He got used to the casual sight of a naked guy showering just 30 feet away, sometimes they would chat with him while they were showering, especially in the evenings. He and Mason had morning coffee and conversations almost daily while one of them was showering.
Michael pulled the jeep right next to a nearly identical jeep and then turned off the engine. It was instantaneously quiet and much easier to talk without the sound of the construction or jeep engine. Michael detailed the features of the Vista level, and then pointed out the seven different buildings far up a hillside on the third level, called Cielo. There were a few “artist in residence” cabins for rotating yoga instructors, musicians, guides, and dreamers. And also a handful of cabins for retreat attendees, plus a large hall for group meditation and gatherings that they called “the practice room.” There was another indoor/outdoor shower which was done and usable if you were willing to hike the 10 minutes up the steep hill.
“Mason will drive you up there and then get you sorted in the Airstream too. I need to run to town before the lumber yard closes.” Michael said before getting out of the jeep. Mason slid over to the drivers seat, and as Casey hopped out to get into the front seat Michael came over to give him a big hug. “Welcome to Alturas Tranquilos Casey! We are so happy to have you here!” Casey reciprocated, he liked the way Michael hugged and how he smelled to, like sage and work, like a man but somehow like Plumerias too. Michael jumped into the other jeep and tore down the hill as Mason and Casey slowly made their way up the steep switchback road to the Cielo level. Mason pointed out everything they had built and their uses, as well as the natural landmarks and their importance, a little cave, cliffs, and nearly every location where they had encountered rattlesnakes.
The winding dirt road crisscrossed walking trails and stairs that connected the Cielo level and the Vista level to each of the thoughtfully situated hillside buildings. They drove to the very top, where it ended at the Practice Room which was entirely complete. Just the sight of the building as Mason cut the engine took Casey’s breath away a bit, it was a rectangular cinder block building with complete walls to the East, South, and North, and entirely glass to the West. Burrowed into the hillside, and much bigger than it looked from below, it could probably fit 100 people. Simple, and serene, with sparse furniture and a stacked pile of pillows and folded blankets just inside the glass entrance. Inside a massive hand painted mandala mural adorned the Eastern wall, with smaller but just as intricate mandala murals on the North and South walls. Casey took his shoes off, and without thinking about it walked tenderly to the center of the room. Standing in the middle of the space, the three murals held the container and focused Casey’s attention, looking West with clear views towards the stunning Yucca Valley and the snow-capped San Gabriel Mountains in the far distance. He unfocused his eyes, letting himself fall into a moment which had already started coming on when he first looked into the sacred room. He stood completely motionless for a few minutes before sort of snapping out of it and turning to look for Mason, who was gone. He saw that one of the huge glass doors was slid open so he walked over and peaked out, finding Mason sitting cross-legged on an intricately sewn pillow nestled into a gigantic tree stump, which must have been from a Redwood or a Sequioa, big enough for 3 or 4 people to lay down. “Wow” was all Casey could say. “Right.” Mason smiled, “I’m glad you feel it.” Casey knew what he meant, this was a special place. They would spend nearly another hour up here, just sitting, and looking, and talking. Mason told Casey about the land and its history, about the indigenous tribes of the Sonoran and Mojave deserts. A reverence in Mason’s voice as he told the stories of the land and the people almost put Casey in a trance, he felt indescribable deference and gratitude. If someone had told him that just this morning he was sitting on the cliffs of the Pacific Ocean he wouldn’t have believed them, or that he had only driven inside the gates of Alturas Tranquilos a few hours ago. His bags were still in the bus, but his core, his soul, or whatever he really was, had already diffused.
He spent what was left of the day settling in, arranging himself in the Airstream, and meeting the rest of the Residents. All of them very different, interesting, and present. He helped prepare a family style dinner that was ready at nearly the exact time Michael returned from town. Following dinner clean up there was a welcome bonfire on the Cielo level in Casey’s honor. The night sky was clear and dark, one of the Residents pointed out planets, and stars, and constellations, Casey couldn’t stop watching the Milky Way. The whole thing felt sublime. He had tears in his eyes as he fell asleep, from the day, and the transition, but also from the energy on the land, and the people that were now holding it, and him. He had a dream that it wouldn’t be fair to retell here, only Casey can do that, but it was a ritualistic meeting with the traditional holders of the land, the tribal elders. It was vivid, and intense. He felt completely exposed, they seemed to see all of him, every laugh, all of his pain, every desire, and every shadow. He felt unconditional acceptance and intense humility. Waking just before sunrise, he wrote down the details of this meeting under a constant stream of tears. He would have to recall this dream later in his life when the darkness overcame him, and he couldn’t find the way out anymore. The ragged desert note he scribbled that morning, and the protective spell the elders had cast in a dream, still intact.
After he finished writing Casey sat outside wrapped in a blanket watching the sunrise, Mason peered out of the Mandala Hut, pleased to see Casey awake and outside. Mason was straight, most of the boys were straight. Out of the 7 Residents and the other 5 Regulars (that’s what they called the ones who came out every week for 3-4 days but otherwise lived off-site) a few were gay, or at least not straight, and Michael was definitely gay, but none of it seemed to matter one way or another. They were designers, and builders, artists, writers, and musicians first. They were dreamers and doers, they were seekers who weren’t waiting for someone else’s permission to start living. They had profound respect for the land, and also a palpable commitment to fun, and camaraderie, and community. They all seemed to love everything, or at least a wild variety of things. They were united by passion, and drive, and nowness. Gay, straight, or in between just didn't seem to be on their radar of vital things.
Casey settled right in and started being himself more than he ever had. The version of him who had sat numb and fractured on the rooftop of the Presidio with Daniel just two weeks ago seemed like an apparition. He felt strength, and direction. This probably would have been a good time for him to surface what he had glanced by that night on the Presidio with Daniel, the dizzying and searing pain, but unfortunately he didn’t. This new Casey didn’t want anything to do with that old Casey.
In February Vhu came up for a weekend with his new boyfriend, a sweet and funny cowboy dentist that Casey took a liking to right away. They arrived on a Harley Davidson and spent most of the weekend working on the Quonset Hut. Casey helped unpack crates of furniture, and art and lights, and he spent half the time in the rafters running wires, attaching pulleys, and placing artwork. This Quonset Hut was starting to feel a lot like the one in San Diego, more Joshua Tree, but with the same aesthetic. Casey felt kind of like he had traveled back in time to when Vhu first put the Quonset Hut together. Plus Vhu was telling him stories about it the whole time, and how he met Michael and all of the other projects they had worked on together. Casey realized that this whole thing, his move to Alturas Tranquilos, all of it, was Vhu’s doing, he felt very lucky.
A few days before Presidents Day weekend Michael called everyone together to tell them that he was going to San Francisco and that they could all take 3 days away if they wanted too, they were welcome to stay and relax but he wanted everyone to take a break. Casey decided to head back to San Diego and called Matt and Daniel so he could split his time between them, with no plan to go back to his parents house at all.
It turned out Matt and his college buddies were having a big bonfire at the beach on Friday night. So Casey left Joshua Tree midday Friday, planning to sleep in the bus in Pacific Beach Friday and then head to the boat to spend the night with Daniel on Saturday.
New Readers!
Here’s a link so you can start at Chapter 1.
your photography really adds so much